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10/12/2026, Meditation Guidelines/Instruction
09/14/2026, Carolyn Carr-Starr
Dear Steward Council,
I’ve been a member of HoA since 2024, and I too am writing out of a deep concern for the well-being and vitality of our community. I joined HoA while a slow organizational restructuring was taking place. HoA was transitioning from an autocratic form of governance toward a more grass roots, transparent, inclusive system of self governance. The new organizational model is designed to model Buddhist principles of tolerance, loving kindness, inclusivity and interdependence. This model inspired me to join our Sangha.
Recently I’ve heard voices of some members and friends who’ve resigned and are disgruntled and expressing frustrations. Yet underlying frustrations I sense a very similar desire for our Sangha to collectively embrace the values of tolerance, inclusivity, collaboration and transparency. While a new model of shared-governance sounds more appealing and rewarding than simply handing leadership over to others, our success will require far more committed participation than we have been used to. We each need to acquire the patience to slow down our decision making process in order to collectively share input and ideas (the member Portal might be a helpful tool enabling this) and for HoA representatives and members to curtail our own ego reactivity; to listen deeply to our peers and to invite and merge our own desires with other’s ideas and concerns. In other words, a willingness to work in actual “collaboration” with others. As always on life’s journey, an increase in freedom and privilege comes with the requirement of increased responsibility.
I believe that underneath disgruntled innuendos and misunderstandings, whether we realize it or not, we all desire the same thing: an open, collaborative cohesive community. So now we have to commit to extra time and effort it will take to hear, understand and include each other’s concerns. For example, a commitment to inclusivity in a collaborative organization would require those Steward Council and Committee members who recently resigned to have demonstrated more patience and tolerance themselves in order to collaboratively incorporate the suggestions, input and participation from their peers in order to consider win-win solutions rather than pushing their preferred outcome. It also requires that our Steward Council and Committee members invest more time, consideration and effort to announce their meeting dates, times and agendas well in advance, as well as to disclose ongoing developments and decisions taking place by posting accurate, timely and accessible minutes. How else can we embody the tolerance, inclusivity and transparency we collectively desire?
It seems to me that HoA has not yet fully embraced our new organizational model. Perhaps some of us are still resenting an outdated patriarchal autocratic model which in actuality, is no longer relevant. Please pause to consider this and just take a much deeper look. It seems several members are resistant to even signing up on the Member Portal where they might learn new ways in which members are being invited to interact and fully participate. Others may have looked around the portal briefly, but not really studied our new model with it’s potential to help us collaborate and unify. It seems HoA began organizational change in theory, while in practice we’ve not yet embodied our new model, much less given it time to prove itself. Doing so requires a personal commitment to acquire and practice new skills and apply the extra time it takes to implement these higher values. Perhaps the real resistance to “change” is unwillingness to fully embrace our new organizational model, now available at our very fingertips.
I perceive that HoA has now reached a critical point in its evolution. It is now time to determine if we each, as individuals, are actually capable of embracing higher principles by learning skillful means for shared responsibility. Also to be willing to apply the extra effort it takes to learn to share and collaborate fully and cohesively. My hope is that an open meeting (if very skillfully facilitated so as to avoid further polarization, while highlighting shared values and emphasizing practical strategies for implementing them) might provide HoA just the opportunity we need to bring several misperceptions/misunderstandings to light in order to facilitate more cohesion, healing and reconciliation between members. Thank you for your service.
Caroline
08/19/2026, Caroline Carr-Starr
Circle of Mindful Connection
In light of Rhonda’s recent passing, it occurs to some of us that an HoA Sangha Phone Circle might be a simple, mutual way of staying connected and caring for one another. A Sangha Phone Circle could enable members to stay connected with one another without placing the responsibility and duty for regular contact on just one or two members.
I’d like to encourage anyone who may be willing, to contact our Member Well-Being Committee to help fine tune the details in order to implement this idea. The basic idea is simple: Each person has someone to call, and each person has someone who calls them. The Member Well-Being Committee would organize and support the system, but the Sangha members themselves would provide the caring connection. We could provide two levels of member participation: (1) A “Checking-In” Phone Circle and (2) A “Checking-Up” Circle (chiefly for members living alone).
1. The “Checking-In” Phone Circle
Members who would like regular contact can be paired with another Sangha member, for example: Mary><Tom. Each pair decides together how often they would like to connect—perhaps weekly, every two weeks, or monthly. The call doesn’t need to be long or formal. It might simply be, “Hi, I was thinking about you and wanted to see how you’re doing.” The purpose is friendship, connection, and awareness of one another’s lives. If someone is going through a difficult time, the phone partner can ask, “Is there anything the Sangha could do that would be helpful?” If additional support is needed, the member can contact one of the two Member Well-Being Committee members.
2. The “Checking-Up” Circle, principally for someone living alone
Some of our members who are alone or elderly may prefer something different, something more frequent and focused — contact simply to know that someone will notice if they don’t answer. This would be completely voluntary. The member might choose: a daily call, a call every other day, several calls per week or whatever frequency feels appropriate. For additional reliability, elders who choose this option could be placed in three-person circles rather than pairs. For example: Mary → John → Susan (and back to) → Mary. Each person has one person they normally call, with the third person providing back-up.
The group agrees beforehand on what to do if someone doesn’t answer. For example:
1. The regular caller tries again later.
2. If there is still no response, the backup person tries.
3. If the person has requested it, a designated family member, friend, or Member Well-Being Committee member is contacted.
4. Any further action is based on the individual’s previously stated wishes.
The purpose is not to monitor or supervise participants. It is simply an additional layer of connection and reassurance for those who want it.
The Role of the Member Well-Being Committee
The Member Well-Being Committee does not become responsible for making all the calls. Instead, the committee members serve as organizers and a safety net. Their responsibilities could include: inviting members to participate; creating and maintaining the Phone Circle list, matching people thoughtfully, making sure everyone who wants a partner has one; helping find a new partner when circumstances change; checking periodically to see whether the circles are working; responding when a member or phone partner brings a concern to them and helping to coordinate additional Sangha support when appropriate. This keeps the workload manageable while allowing the whole Sangha to participate in caring for one another.
Consent and Privacy
Participation should always be voluntary. Each participant can decide: whether to participate, who may have their phone number, how frequently they want contact, whether they want the “Checking-In” circle or the more frequent and focused “Checking-Up” circle, whom to contact if they cannot be reached, and what, if anything, they want shared with the Member Well-Being Committee. The Phone Circle is based on compassion, trust, and consent — not surveillance. A phone partner is not expected to be a caregiver, counselor, or emergency responder. The Sangha Phone Circle is ultimately about a very simple Sangha-wide (community supported) loving kindness practice. No one needs to feel forgotten — no one is beyond our attention and compassion. Some members may need only an occasional friendly call while other, particularly someone living alone, may find great comfort in knowing that someone will.
In appreciation & love,
Caroline
1(828) 788-0140 ccarrstarr@gmail.com
